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I thought it would be good to reach out and see how he was doing.That Friday I arrived at his house. I visited with him and his partner for hours and had lots of laughs with plenty of alcohol. Finally it was bed time and I adjourned to the guest room. I looked at the book shelf for something to read before I went to sleep. There were two book shelves full of gay sex and relationship books. I thought to myself "what do these guys really do in bed?" I had never looked at or watched gay porn before and on the rare occasion I did run across it, it turned me off. I grabbed a book, I don't remember what it was called but it more than opened the door that has lead me to my current sexuality.As I flipped through the pages, reading paragraphs here and there, looking at illustrations, and tasteful black and white pictures of men being intimate. I quickly found myself incredibly hard and a wet spot forming on my underwear. I quickly slid off my underwear and continued to look through. A few weeks later the same scenario played out twice more. These times, however, I saw the flash of uniting genitals before they realized they were being viewed. My father was quite brusque and firmly ordered me back to bed in a commanding voice that conveyed his annoyance with me and my hampering their activities. But my mother spoke also, to me reassuring me that all was okay and encouraging me to go back to sleep. Now I was sure it was intercourse. A couple nights in the following month I sneaked down to peek again, but was afraid to get caught and so only watched for a few moments to observe their private action. The last time I even arrived just as they were climaxing together and stayed just long enough to observe the aftermath. Then my folks no longer did it downstairs but behind the closed door of the bedroom.My Oedipus Complex comes from years of masturbating outside the door of my parents bedroom while I listened to them. My mother was quite verbal when she had an.
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